No Cheating, No Dying
I Had a Good Marriage. Then I Tried To Make It Better.
Elizabeth Weil believes that you don’t get married in a white dress, in front of all your future in-laws and ex-boyfriends but gradually, over time, through all the road rage incidents and pre-colonoscopy enemas, good and bad dinners, and all the small moments you never expected to happen or much less endure. In this book, Weil examines the major universal marriage issues—sex, money, mental health, in-laws, children—through bravely recounting her own hilarious, messy, and sometimes difficult relationship. She seeks out the advice of financial planners, psychoanalysts, therapists, household management consultants, priests, rabbis, and the
Kelly Corrigan and Liz Weil, Piedmont Center for the Arts 5
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Read an Excerpt
I have a good marriage.
I had a good marriage before I spent a year improving it, and I have a good marriage now. In fact, my marriage is better, truly better. Although not in the ways I’d expected.
When I set out to improve my marriage, I assumed that better would look like a Photoshopped version of good: essentially unchanged, unsightly elements gone. Dan would no longer butcher headless, skinless pigs and goats on our kitchen island. I would not tidy up, literally and psychologically, by shoving junk in drawers. We would quit outsourcing the production of our... see more
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Reading Group Guide
Elizabeth Weil and her husband, Dan Duane, had two ground rules for their marriage: no cheating, no dying. This mantra worked well for a decade, until Elizabeth decided to up the ante. Part memoir and part savvy self-help guide, No Cheating, No Dying is a forthright, funny book about a happy marriage and the therapies, exercises, and attitudes that might make it even better…or not.
Topics & Questions for Discussion
1. Elizabeth Weil begins No Cheating, No Dying by stating that she “had a good marriage.” (p. 1) Why then does she set out to improve it? What were your initial thoughts about this endeavor?
2. Elizabeth admits the marriage improvement project made her relationship with Dan “truly better,” although not in the ways she expected. (p. 1) What are her expectations going into this experiment? What turns out differently than she anticipated?
3. What is your overall opinion of Elizabeth and Dan as a couple? What about each one individually? What are the major strengths and see more